Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Inov-8 310s in search of Mr. Right

Hi, my name is Flyroc and I’m looking for a new owner.  My current Master purchased me at the Merrimack River Trail Race and one week later took me on a 10 mile jaunt in Blue Hills Reservation. It’s the only time I was able to run wild since April. Although he told me he was very pleased with my performance, he said my low heel caused pain to his plantar fascia. I told him to stop being a candy-ass sissy-boy and to man up. He responded by tying me up and stuffing me into a dark, cramped cardboard box. I haven’t seen the light of day in four months. I really need to feel the earth beneath my endurance rubber soles and the wind through my breathable mess uppers. Won’t you please help me?

I am extremely loyal and require very little care. I do not need to be watered or fed and only need an occasion bath when I become so stinky that your significant other will make me sleep out on the back porch. I will protect you from all harm (below the ankle) and will bring you hours of freedom and joy. I am most happy when running over gnarly roots, ridiculous rocks, wading through water and muddling in mud. Sorry, I do not enjoy long walks on the beach, unless maybe it’s at the Cape Cod Frozen Fat Ass. In that case, you better be moving faster than a walk or you’ll freeze off more that your ass.

If interested in a mutually satisfying, long-term (as in 400-500 miles) relationship, please contact me here.

PS If you're one that believes size matters, then I'm a size 10.5.

4 comments:

  1. I picked up a pair of roclite 295. haven't tried out, but seem pretty stiff.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Dan,

    I am interested but you left out one important piece of info.....what size are they?
    Kevin

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh Sweet FlyRock, you sound like the soles for me. The feet which merely toyed with you--I've seen them, smelt them; they are trollish and undeserving of your in-souls. Unfortunately, while it doesn't matter to me, your size is, well, too big for this pixie.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I saw my friend with these and he loves them so much but i'm still reluctant to buy one since i'm still hooked with my nike sparq but i guess i still need to test them out first before anything

    ReplyDelete

What's on your mind?

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...